sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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