Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
