Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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