i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
