You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
