You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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