I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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