i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
