I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
