hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Damn victory sex feels great
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
