every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
