Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
