were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
