i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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