sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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