I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
