okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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