The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
