I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
