If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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