Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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