oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
