Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
