OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
