i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
i think i have two assholes
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Shame - the story of my life.
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