You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
