I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
well I can't set my house on fire every night
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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