i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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