it wasn't lemon gatorade
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Will exercising make me less horny?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
