weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
