why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
