it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
