Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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