she smelled like a LAN party
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
