Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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