Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
