i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
