Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
