I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
