you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
