is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
