Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize