Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Do vagina's smell?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
