I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
