I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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