college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Randomize
