oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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