you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
