How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
