I need help removing her.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Randomize
