that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
